Long Ago and Far Away
by Stormchilde
Summary: Thomas asks Rick to help him out on a case by going undercover – as a patient at a psychiatric facility.
1. Chapter 1

Title: Long ago and far away  
Author: Harper's Cat AKA Stormchilde  
Archive: please ask, you know I'll say yes.  
Disclaimer: I don't own Magnum P.I., Hawaii or any of the characters you recognize from television. I make no money from this, no copyright infringement is intended.  
Rating:T for adult language and violence.  
Setting/Season: Late fourth season.  
Spoilers: Season Four – Distant Relative  
Warnings: Adult language, violence resulting in death.  
Comments/Feedback: Please, feed The Cat!  
Summary: Thomas asks Rick to help him out on a case by going undercover – as a patient at a psychiatric facility.

A/N: I always wondered what made Orville into Rick, where he got the scars both physical and mental.

Many thanks to my ever patient beta: DiClare, without her I'd have been lost.

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In 1967 a young man named Orville Wright went to war in Vietnam …

He never returned.

_Rick stood in the doorway of the helicopter, the backwash from the rotors whipping his dark hair into his eyes. He tensed, staring into the tangled undergrowth as he heard the sounds of something crashing through. Rick flicked off the safety and cocked the M-60, preparing to mow down the approaching soldiers if they weren't Americans. Rifle fire cracked just beyond the clearing. _

"_We can't stay Orville, we're gonna be overrun any minute."_

"_Just a couple more minutes Theodore. They're gonna be here, I can feel it." _

"_With a bunch of VC on their tails." TC grumbled._

_Soldiers tore into the clearing, occasionally turning to fire back into the woods they had so quickly departed._

"_Get your asses in here!" Rick shouted. "I'll cover you!" He fired over their heads, peppering the trees with bullets._

_The GIs crouched low, darting through the tall grass and toward the waiting chopper. One soldier remained behind, still firing back into the trees._

"_Move it you guys!" Rick yelled as the men crowded on board. "Lieutenant! Get in, we gotta go now!" He shouted to the remaining soldier. _

_The lieutenant turned and darted for the chopper, Vietnamese soldiers ran from the trees and Rick methodically picked them off as they tried to advance on the bird. The last man jumped on just as Theodore lifted off. Rick continued to fire, taking out more of the enemy troops. The Vietnamese soldiers were close; so close he could see the expressions on their faces as they died. _

"I just need someone to go in there and keep an eye on her. It's an easy job, just a couple of days."

"If it's so easy why don't you do it?" Rick was busy checking the paperwork against the wines that had been delivered.

"I can't, if she knows someone is watching her she'll alert who ever it is she's working with on the outside and I'll never break this case."

"Why me?" Rick asked, still not paying much attention to Magnum, "Why not TC?"

"TC's booked this week. Come on Rick, I really need some help on this." Magnum handed Rick a photo, "She's just a kid and if she's not involved in it, she's going to need someone in there to protect her." Thomas knew that Rick wouldn't turn down a woman in danger. It didn't hurt that Mia was the same age as Rick's sister and bore a slight resemblance to the murdered girl.

"Why is that whenever I agree to help you on a case I always end up regretting it?"

"You won't regret this one."

"That's what you always say." Rick signed the receipts and put them in an envelope, "If I'm gonna pull this off I'm gonna need a couple of days to get stuff together."

"How about tomorrow night?"

"Thomas!" He scowled at Magnum, "This isn't like convincing your mom you're too sick to go to school, we're talking doctors here!"

"Well, can't you speed things up?"

Rick shook his head, knowing it was useless to argue; "I'll do what I can."

"Great!" Magnum grinned, "I'll pick you up at four."

Rick sighed; it was going to be a long 22 hours.

When Magnum met him at the door the next evening the taller man almost didn't recognize his friend.

The normally meticulous Rick was unshaven, his hair was messy, dark circles ringed his bloodshot eyes and the shirt he was wearing looked like it hadn't been taken off in a week.

"What happened to you?" Magnum asked.

"Nothing happened to me. What the hell do you want?"

"What?"

"I'm getting into character, okay," Rick ran his fingers through his hair, spiking it even more. "I'm supposed to be grouchy, I haven't slept in three days."

"Huh?"

Rick rolled his eyes, "Forget it Thomas, just let me do the talking when we get there."

Magnum didn't say much at the hospital, just agreed that Rick was behaving very un-like himself and that he thought Rick needed help before it developed into something more serious.

It was well after 7 o'clock when Rick was finished with all his lab work and he returned to the consultation room where Thomas had been waiting for him.

Magnum was amazed at the way Rick acted, the younger man paced swiftly, eyes moving just as quickly as his feet. Even his speech was rapid; it was as if his entire body was on overdrive.

When the doctor suggested that Rick needed help and might benefit by staying at a local in patient care facility, Thomas almost cried when Rick refused.

"Come on Rick," he pleaded, not in the least putting on an act, "You'll like it there; Manoa Palms is a really nice place. I can visit you every day." Magnum glanced at the doctor who nodded. "Please man, you need help."

Rick paused for a moment, glancing furtively at Thomas as if he suspected some kind of trap, "Just for a couple of days, no longer?"

"Just a couple of days, I promise."

"I can leave if I want to?" Rick asked the doctor.

"As long as you aren't a danger to yourself or others and I'm not seeing anything like that right now."

"All right," Rick sighed, "I'll do it."

Magnum nearly laughed, he was so relieved.

Dr. Collins signed some papers and handed them to Magnum, "Just give these to the nurse at Manoa. I'll call and get everything set up for his arrival."

Thomas filled Rick in on the case when they went back to the house to pack a bag for Rick.

"Her name is Mia Metcalf, her father, Walter, was the controlling owner of MetaCor before he died. The balance of the stock belongs to her stepmother Brooke and her cousins. Two of the three cousins have died in bizarre accidents, Brooke thinks that someone is out to get the family fortune by killing off the rest of the stockholders. All I need for you do to do is talk to her and find out what she knows."

"Sounds easy enough." Rick agreed.

Manoa Palms resembled a private vacation paradise once you got past the security doors and guards. A nurse was waiting in the lobby for them when they arrived. She accepted the papers Magnum handed her and laid out a few more that Rick had to sign. The aide that showed them back to the room was a couple of inches taller than Magnum, the smile on his face did nothing to set Rick at ease.

Magnum accompanied Rick to his room, helped him unpack and listened while Rick was given a list of the rules and an itinerary for the morning.

"Listen man," Magnum yawned, "it's late so I'm going home and I'll let you get some sleep. I'll come back tomorrow and see how you're getting on."

"It'll be late before I can do much of anything, how about I call you if I find anything."

Magnum tried to cover another yawn, "Yeah. That's fine."

Rick didn't have to pretend he couldn't sleep that night. He'd never show his unease in front of Magnum but the very idea of being in such a place completely unnerved him. He paced the room, hoping to wear down the anxiety that plagued him. He didn't know why he did it, but he couldn't stop himself from checking to see that the door to his room was unlocked every time he passed it. He was startled by a soft knock after once such check, and his voice wavered when he answered, "Yes?"

"Mr. Wright, I'm the night duty nurse, Susan." The door opened and the young woman who had met them when they arrived, stepped in, "I noticed your light was still on, can I get you something to help you sleep?"

He debated the offer, he needed sleep if he were going to be any help to Thomas but the idea of being drugged in a strange place didn't really appeal to him either. "No. Thanks, I think I'll just read for a little bit then I'll go to sleep."

Susan smiled, "Let me know if you change your mind, all you have to do is dial 300."

"I keep that in mind." Rick continued to pace after she left but after a half an hour he turned off the light and laid down on the bed. He tried to relax but his mind refused to sleep, he was still awake when the morning shift nurse came by to escort him to the dining room for breakfast.


	2. Chapter 2 Wake Me

Long Ago and Far Away

Chapter 2 – Wake Me

"Dammit Thomas have you lost your mind? You remember what Orville was like when we came back." TC glared at him, "You shouldn't have even asked him."

"Well, you wouldn't do it and I needed someone in there." Magnum pouted. "Rick wanted to help."

"He could get into all kinds of trouble in there."

"Rick will be fine. You worry too much." Thomas smiled, "Besides, I'll be checking on him every day."

"Every day?"

"Well, pretty often."

"Yeah, right."

"I'm pretty busy, I have to give Brooke, Mrs. Metcalf an update on the case."

"I've seen Mrs. Brooke Metcalf," TC grumbled, "and that better be all you're giving her."

"I'm a professional TC, and I never let my feelings for a woman get in the way of a case." Magnum protested.

"Uh huh."

_It's easy, just talk to her and find out what she knows. _Magnum had said. _Yeah right. What if she won't talk to anyone?_ Rick was so caught up with trying to figure out a way to talk to her that he didn't watch where he was walking. He stumbled and his breakfast tray slid from his hands; most of it crashed to the floor, the tall glass of ice-cold juice hit Mia on the shoulder, the contents spilling down the front of her blouse. She didn't say anything, didn't even blink as he apologized profusely and tried to wipe the liquid off her with his handkerchief.

"Don't worry about it Mr. Wright, I'll take care of her," said Julie. "Please, go ahead and sit, Marcus can bring you another tray."

Rick stared into Mia's eyes, the emptiness in them cut into him and he couldn't bring himself to walk away. Julie's hand on his arm gently but insistently encouraged him to move and he reluctantly took a seat at the next table.

Marcus brought him another breakfast tray and he picked at the food, frequently glancing at Mia who was being fed something that resembled grey applesauce through a tube.

"What's wrong with her?"

"She's catatonic. She's been like this for almost a year after she saw her father murdered."

"Oh." It seemed to him that there was a flare of emotion in Mia's eyes for a moment.

"I'm sorry."

"We hope that she'll eventually recover, Dr. Harrison is trying a new therapy with her that seems to be having some effect."

Rick smiled, "That's good, it must be terrible to be locked up inside yourself."

Julie paused for a moment, then smiled at Mia, "Yes. To be locked inside yourself must be the worst kind of prison."

Rick wasn't really hungry but he picked at his food for a while longer, leaving the dining room shortly after Julie took Mia outside.

Back in his room he debated on whether to call Magnum or not, he didn't have a whole lot to report. He wasn't a doctor, but to his eyes Mia was not a threat to anyone, more likely a victim of whoever was behind her father's murder.

The sound of the phone ringing startled him, the tone was harsh and tinny.

It was Magnum, checking on him.

"How are you doing?" Thomas asked.

"Okay, I guess. It's pretty quiet here."

"Quiet huh?"

"Yeah, really, really quiet."

"So how about I come and see you?"

"You don't have to do that today Thomas, maybe tomorrow. Give me some more time to get settled, you know."

"If that's what you want, then I'll come by tomorrow."

"Yeah Thomas."

"Rick, are you okay?"

"I'm fine."

"You sound tired."

"I guess I am a little."

"Relax, don't worry about work. TC and I are taking care of everything."

"That's supposed to reassure me?" Rick teased.

"Aw come on, TC and I can do your job."

"Yeah but it takes both of you and I can do it alone."

Thomas laughed, "Take a nap, stare at the ocean and watch the grass grow for a while. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

"Okay. Bye Thomas."

"See you, Rick."

He hung up the phone, wondering, not for the last time, if he'd made a huge mistake in agreeing to help Thomas with this case.

He tried to take Magnum's advice and relax but he couldn't shake the feeling that everything he did was scrutinized by someone. It was impossible to take it easy when he felt like a specimen under a microscope.

At dinner that evening, the nurse took a chair beside him, "You haven't eaten much today, are you feeling alright?"

So much for the idea that he was being paranoid, they had been watching him.

"I'm fine." He lied

"Is there some dish that you'd prefer?" Susan laid a gentle hand on his arm, "The chef can fix you something else if you don't care for this." She looked at his plate, he'd broken up the fish fillet and pushed around the steamed vegetables but had eaten very little of it.

"No, it's good, really. I'm just not very hungry."

Susan smiled conspiratorially and whispered, "I hate the vegetables too. If you'd like some pudding I can get you some."

"Thanks, maybe later." He couldn't help but smile back.

"I'll bring you some before lights out." She winked and left him.

Later that evening, Susan brought him a dish of chocolate pudding. He said he'd eat it but as soon as she left he dumped it in the toilet.

Day two and Rick still hadn't slept for more than a couple of hours. He was nervous and jumpy. Old reflexes surfaced and he'd come close to striking the nurse when he didn't hear her approaching him after breakfast.

"Sorry." Rick rubbed his hands together, "This is … not a place I'm used to."

"It's okay, everyone tends to be on edge when they first get here but after a couple of more days you'll find you're more relaxed." Julie set a small paper cup on the table, "If you'll take your morning meds I'll personally give you a tour of the garden."

Rick picked up the cup and poured the capsules out into his hand, "What is it?"

"Nothing bad except for the taste," she joked, "It's a multivitamin supplement. Dr. Harrison won't prescribe anything for you until after your conference this afternoon."

Rick tossed the capsules in his mouth and swallowed them with a drink of water.

He made a face, "You're right about the taste."

"I can open them up and put them in applesauce if you'd prefer."

"No thanks, I'd rather just swallow them." He finished the glass of water and followed the nurse outside.

"You know the vitamins absorb better when taken with food."

Rick frowned at her, "I am eating."

Julie's smile was nothing like Susan's, Rick felt like she could see through every lie he told her.

"Several of the patients enjoy growing flowers and vegetables here in the courtyard garden, do you have a green thumb?"

"Not so much," said Rick, admiring the way the paths wound in among the trees and bushes.

"We have a larger garden on the east side that borders the forest," Julie continued, "It has a beautiful view of the mountains. There's a deck at the back of the courtyard where you can sit and look at the ocean." Julie gave him a complete tour of the facility, showing him the treatment rooms, the doctor's patient conference rooms and a common room where the patients could gather to watch TV, play games and receive visitors. They were on the way back to the dining room when Marcus stopped Julie.

"Dr. Harrison needs Byron's med tray brought to his office." The aide told her.

"I'm sorry Mr. Wright," Julie unlocked the door of the office behind the nurses' station, "can you find your way back without me?"

Rick smiled, "I'll be fine, thank you for showing me around."

"Dr. Harrison has your consult scheduled for 3 o'clock, would you like Marcus to take you?"

Rick glanced warily at the hulking aide; "I can find it alright by myself, thanks."

He walked out to the courtyard and found Mia sitting in the shade of a palm tree, facing the ocean.

"Hi Mia." He said gently. "It's Rick. You remember me? We met in the dining room at breakfast. I wanted to apologize again for spilling my orange juice on you. I really am sorry." He crouched in front of her and smiled. He knew she would not answer, she just continued to stare vacantly at him. "I wish you could talk to me."

"Miss Metcalf is incapable of understanding or responding to you, Mr. Wright." a voice broke in.

Rick looked up to see Julie. "I know." His voice softened. "I still like to talk to her."

"You seem to have taken to her rather quickly." Julie smiled.

"She reminds me of someone." Rick said softly, still smiling at Mia.

"Someone special?"

"My sister Wendy. She died."

"I'm sorry." Julie checked the iv in Mia's arm, "Were you and your sister close?"

"As much as we could be, she lived in Chicago."

"Did your sister die in an accident?"

Rick didn't answer and after a few moments of awkward silence, Julie left.

"It was my fault." Rick whispered, staring at Mia. "If I hadn't made her come to visit me, she would have been safe."


	3. Chapter 3 Stirring Echoes

Long Ago and Far Away

Chapter 3 – Stirring Echoes

Shortly after lunch, Magnum arrived, bringing with him a handful of newspapers and a crossword puzzle book for Rick. They sat at one of the tables on the deck overlooking the ocean.

"So, how's it going?" Thomas asked, "Did you talk to her?"

"I talked, she listened." Rick answered, "Thomas there's no way Mia is involved in the attacks on her family. She is totally catatonic."

"Well maybe she's just pretending. Are you sure she couldn't be getting out?"

"Thomas." Rick said in an aggravated tone, "I'm telling you it's not her."

"Can you stay a little longer just to make sure?"

"This isn't a resort, Thomas." Rick argued. "I'm not having fun here."

"I know, I know. I talked to her step-mother this morning and she said that last night someone tried to break into her house, I just want to be sure. Brooke is really scared that someone is trying to kill her."

"Brooke?"

"She asked me to call her by her first name," Thomas explained, "she said being called Mrs. Metcalf just reminds her that she's a widow."

"Sure."

"So will you stay a little longer, make certain it's not Mia? Please?"

"Stop begging, I'll stay a couple more days but no promises after that."

"Thanks Rick, I owe you."

"You owe me big for this one, Thomas."

"She was relieved to know that you're here, keeping an eye on Mia."

"Who?"

"Brooke. She wanted to know what I was doing and I told her you were here, helping me out."

"What if it's Brooke?"

"What if what's Brooke?"

"What if she's the killer?"

"Come on Rick, don't be cr… that's ridiculous." He looked at his watch, "Umm, I'm supposed to pick up some stuff for Higgins in town," he got up, "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Hey, bring me a copy of the _Sun_ next time." Rick called.

"Will do." Magnum waved and he was gone.

Rick found Dr. Harrison's office easily, he was disturbed to find Marcus would be sitting in on the session, "Just a formality required by law." Dr. Harrison has assured him. "Dr. Collins suggested that you might be suffering from a manic crisis."

"I don't know what that is, Thomas seemed to think I was having some problems just because I haven't been sleeping much lately."

"Do you think you have a problem?"

Rick hesitated, glancing nervously at Marcus and then to the doctor who seemed to be amused by Rick's discomfort. "I'm okay." Rick replied.

"Do you take any over the counter medications to help you sleep?"

"No."

"Do you drink alcohol?"

"Not much, I have a drink now and then."

"Socially?"

"I have friends."

Harrison smiled, "Do you drink more socially or when you're alone?"

"What's that got to do with anything?"

"It's just a question, you don't have to answer if you'd rather not." Harrison wrote something in the file on his desk. "Why did you agree to come here?"

"They thought I should."

"Who are 'they'?"

"The doctor at the hospital and my friends."

"Do you trust their judgment?"

"I said I'd try it for a couple of days, I didn't make any promises after that."

"Do you feel like people are out to get you?"

Rick laughed, "No."

"Do you hear voices?"

"Just yours."

Dr. Harrison didn't seem to find Rick's reply amusing. "Dr. Collins reports that you are having trouble sleeping."

"I have bad dreams, it keeps me awake." Rick admitted.

"What do you dream about?" The doctor asked.

"I don't know, I can't remember."

"Are you falling in your dreams? Are there people hunting you?"

"People '_hunting_' me?"

"It's a common theme in nightmares," Harrison explained, "Most people have nightmares are being pursued by strange, threatening people."

"I'm running in my dreams but I don't know why."

"Where are you in your dream? Are you alone?"

"I don't know." said Rick, irritably, "It's a dream, I don't remember details."

"Would you be willing to try hypnosis?"

"No." Rick replied quickly.

Harrison scribbled something in the file, the pen seemed to be louder than anything. "I'm prescribing some medications for you, one that you will take at dinner will help you sleep, and another in the morning to alleviate depression."

"I'm not depressed," Rick insisted. "I just can't sleep."

Harrison smiled, "Insomnia is often linked to depression. We'll try this and if in a couple of weeks you feel you don't need it, you won't have to take it anymore."

"Alright."

"I'd like you to try keeping a journal of your dreams, try to write them down after you wake and then we can discuss them."

"What if I can't remember what I dreamed?"

"If the dreams are so disturbing that you can't sleep properly you should be able to remember some details."

"I'll try."

"Good." He closed the file and Rick wondered what he'd been writing besides the medications. "We will meet every afternoon, talk about how you're feeling." Harrison's smile looked forced, "and see if you're making any improvements."

Rick was relieved that the meeting was over, the doctor's questions made him nervous and having Marcus hovering behind him did nothing to ease the anxiety. Walking back out to the gardens, he silently cursed Thomas for talking him into helping. He had to be crazy to have agreed to pretend to be crazy… there was a thought that was a contradiction - crazy to be acting crazy.

Seeing Mia alone by the fountain in the center of the garden brought a sad smile to his lips, if there was any reason to stay here, the girl was it. She sat in the wheelchair, slender hands in her lap, were it not for the slow blink of her eyes, she might have been mistaken for one of the statues that ringed the garden.

He took a seat on the edge of the pool, facing Mia. "It could use some goldfish," he observed, "or koi, don't you think?"

Mia was as quiet as she had been that morning, but he didn't mind. "Maybe a turtle?" He reached over and plucked a flower from the water. "I suppose there's probably some kind of ordinance against keeping turtles in a medical facility." He shook the water off the flower and tucked it gently between Mia's fingers. "At least we have beauty." Her fingers curled a little and Rick gave her hand a gentle squeeze.

"I knew you couldn't resist the Rick Wright charm." He smiled at her, certain that her eyes held a spark of awareness even if it was buried.

"Julie said you'd probably be out here with Mia." It was Susan. "It's nice that she has someone to visit with her."

"Her family doesn't come to see her?"

"Her step-mother comes by sometimes but she never stays long and she mostly talks to Dr. Harrison." Susan unlocked the brakes on the chair, "It's time for dinner, are you hungry?"

His stomach was still in knots but he nodded, "Yeah."

"Good." Susan said, pushing Mia back into the building, "We're having tiramisu for dessert tonight."

He tried to eat, but his stomach was just too nervous. Susan was distracted by feeding Mia and Rick was able to make it look as though he'd eaten as long as no one checked in the wadded up napkin. He didn't really want to take the medication Dr. Harrison had prescribed for him but Susan hadn't taken her eyes off him until the tablets had been swallowed.

"You'll sleep better tonight and that will make you feel better in the morning."

Back in his room he tried to do one of the crosswords in the puzzle book Magnum had brought but the words kept blurring and he gave up and lay down.

For the first time since he'd agreed to help Thomas, he slept the entire night. If he dreamed, he did not remember them.


	4. Chapter 4 Dark Side Of The Street

For Becky, because she asked for more. Thank you for the encouragement!

Long Ago and Far Away

Chapter 4 – Dark Side of the Street

In the morning, Rick awoke feeling hyper-alert. "I just needed a good night's sleep." He told himself as he got dressed to go down to breakfast. His stomach growled and he laughed, "Fresh air and sunshine does wonders for your appetite."

Rick smiled at Julie as he piled his plate with fresh fruit, bypassing the scrambled eggs and not even looking at the sausage.

"You look much better this morning." Julie commented as Rick joined her and Mia.

"I feel much better." He admitted.

Julie passed his cup of morning medications to him after he'd finished his second helping of fruit.

Rick didn't comment on the taste of the vitamins or on the addition of three more tablets.

The nurse watched him carefully, making certain he'd swallowed all the tablets. "Your session with Dr. Harrison is at three o'clock again today." Julie reminded Rick as she wheeled Mia out onto the deck.

"I'll remember." Rick promised.

Dr. Harrison stopped at the nurse's station to drop off the patient charts.

"He's spending far too much time with Miss Metcalf." Harrison noted.

"He's not hurting anyone, Doctor," Julie replied. "He told me that she reminds him of his sister."

"He didn't mention his sister to Dr. Collins."

"Apparently, she died recently; I suppose it's still painful for him."

"Well." He tapped his pen against his teeth. "Perhaps I should bring that up in his next session."

As the morning wore on, Rick grew more and more agitated. He was short-tempered, responding angrily whenever someone spoke to him.

When TC came to visit, Rick glared suspiciously at him, "What do you want?" he demanded.

"Hey man." TC held up his hands, "Take it easy. I just wanted to see how you're doing."

The visit was short and did nothing to reassure TC that Rick was doing okay. As soon as he left Manoa Palms, TC called Magnum. "Rick is acting really weird, Thomas."

"It's just an act, TC; he's supposed to be nuts."

"No man, I don't think this is an act. When was the last time you talked to him?"

"I'm going to call him today."

"When was the last time you talked to him face to face? He's wild, jumping at every little noise and shit like he was … in 'Nam. I don't like it, something's wrong."

"You worry too much, he's fine TC, like I said he's just acting."

"You better hope so, because if anything happens to him because he's helping you out, it's coming out of your skin."

"Take it easy TC."

"I've known Orville longer than you have, I know shit that happened to him over there, he don't need to be reliving that crap."

Rick was still moody when Julie came to get them for lunch, he insisted on dining outside on the deck and after arguing with him for five minutes, Julie finally agreed.

Rick refused to eat until Julie threatened to have Marcus feed him.

"I can feed myself." Rick growled.

"Then do it." Julie pushed the plate back to him.

Rick looked suspiciously at the food, then to Julie.

The nurse rolled her eyes, "I haven't poisoned it if that's what you're thinking." She picked up a spoon and took a bite of the mashed potatoes. "I prefer a little pepper on mine."

Rick ate, hardly taking his eyes off her while Julie fed Mia.

Rick was defiant when Julie reminded him at three o'clock that it was time for his therapy session.

"I'm not going. I'm staying here with Mia."

"No, you aren't." Julie said. "You are going, like it or not."

"You can't make me."

"Maybe I can't," she admitted, "But he can."

Marcus grabbed Rick by the shoulders, picking him up effortlessly. "Let's go, little man." He laughed.

Rick was red-faced and furious by the time the aide had deposited him in the chair in Dr. Harrison's office.

"I can't help you if you won't cooperate." Harrison said solicitously.

"I don't need help!" Rick continued to glare at Marcus.

"Come now, Mr. Wright," Harrison got up and came around to the front of his desk, leaning against the edge and smiling at Rick, "Let's at least try to carry on a conversation, shall we?"

Rick didn't answer.

"You don't want me to have to give you a sedative, do you?"

The threat got Rick's attention.

"No." He turned to face the doctor. "What do you want to talk about?"

"Your parents. They died when you were young?"

"I was fourteen. They were killed in a car wreck."

"What happened to you after that?"

"My mother's sister took us in."

"Us?"

"My sister Wendy and I. Wendy was eight."

"So you were raised by your aunt." Harrison went back to his chair.

"Wendy was, I uh… ran away a year later."

"Was your aunt unkind to you?"

"No, I just didn't think she really wanted to have to raise a boy. She was really good with my sister and times were tough… I wanted to get a job, help pay the expenses."

Dr. Harrison wrote for a moment in the chart, then looked back to Rick, "And did you?"

"Yeah, I got a job and I sent money to my aunt to help pay for my sister's schooling."

"How long did you do that?"

"Until my sister graduated high school."

"That must have been hard on you. You were fifteen and taking on the responsibilities of an adult."

"It was worth it, Wendy turned out to be a good girl."

"How old was she when she died?"

Rick didn't answer, he was suddenly interested in the carpet.

"She was murdered while she was visiting you, correct?"

"Yes." Rick replied softly.

"One more person in your life you failed to protect, isn't that right?" Harrison asked coldly.

"You son of a …" Rick was restrained from attacking the doctor only by Marcus' grip on his shoulder.

"I think we're making important strides in your treatment, Mr. Wright. We'll start working on your anger management issues at your next session." He nodded to Marcus, who escorted Rick to his room with a bruising grip on his arms.

Susan had a difficult time convincing Rick to eat dinner, she too, had to resort to threats to get him to eat. Rick refused to swallow the pills no matter how much Susan asked. Reluctantly, she had Marcus hold him while she injected him with a sedative. "He's certainly not behaving like he was." She observed.

Marcus transferred him to a wheelchair and took him back to his room. As before, when he awoke the next morning he felt better and was ravenously hungry.


	5. Chapter 5 Harm's Way

_Thank you Becky! This one is for you too._

Long Ago and Far Away

Chapter 5 – Harm's Way

Julie watched as he swallowed the medications she gave him, "Very good, Mr. Wright. You're doing much better today." She looked up and saw Magnum crossing the room. "You have a visitor this morning, I'll take Mia outside and you can join her when you two are finished."

"Are you okay?" Thomas asked, noticing the livid bruises on Rick's arms. "What happened to you?"

"Nothing."

"Hey, are you alright?"

"Fine; I'm fine, okay," Rick replied angrily. "Just leave me alone, quit bugging me."

"How about a game of chess?" Magnum laid a travel game set on the table.

Rick stood up and began to pace. "I don't know how to play chess."

"Yes you do," Magnum laughed, "you win the chess tournament every year."

"I do?"

"Come on Rick, sit down will you," Magnum cajoled. "You're wearing me out just watching you."

"I'm fine. I don't want to sit." He continued to pace, "You got a cigarette?"

"Rick, you quit smoking."

"I did?" He looked confused. "Do you want one?"

"I don't smoke cigarettes." Magnum grinned at him. "You can cut the act now, it's just us."

"What are you talking about?"

"Stop acting like you're going nuts, okay, it's getting on my nerves."

"I'm not nuts, you're the one that's nuts."

"Look Rick," Magnum began nervously, "I appreciate your help on this case but maybe you should get out of here."

"I'm not leaving Wendy."

"Wendy is dead, Rick."

"I know that Thomas!" He glared furiously at Magnum, clenching and unclenching his fists. "I'm staying right here!"

"Hey, calm down." Thomas stood up and Rick backed away from him.

"It might be a good idea if you come back tomorrow." said Julie, stepping between the two men. "Mr. Wright has been a little agitated today."

"No kidding." Magnum stared worriedly at his friend. "Would it be possible for me to talk to Dr. Harrison?"

"I'm sorry, Dr. Harrison has a meeting at the hospital this morning and he has therapy sessions scheduled for the entire afternoon."

"I just need to talk to him for a couple of minutes."

"You might be able to catch him at the hospital but after that his schedule is full. I can make an appointment for you tomorrow if you'd like."

"No, that's okay. I'll try to catch him at the hospital." Magnum took a step toward Rick, who retreated again. "I'll see you tomorrow, okay Rick?"

Rick didn't answer and Thomas left, promising himself that he'd do whatever it took to get Rick out of Manoa Palms.

He had no luck in catching up with Dr. Harrison at the hospital and his conversation with Dr. Collins didn't improve his mood. Collins had declined to removed Rick from Manoa since his behavior had gone from merely avoiding his friends to almost attacking them. He didn't agree to transferring Rick to a different facility either, insisting that Rick would be better off staying in the care of Dr. Harrison, who had initiated a treatment regime.

His day went further downhill when TC called, raging because he'd gone to see Rick and had also witnessed the uncharacteristic fury in their young friend.

"I told you! I told you something bad would happen to him in there," TC yelled and Thomas winced, holding the phone out as TC continued to yell. "But you never listen, you just use everybody to get what you want and never caring 'bout the consequences!"

"I tried to get him to leave TC, but he didn't want to."

"He's in that place 'cause he was helpin' you!" Whenever TC really got angry, his southern accent became more noticeable and it was in full drawl now. "Now you better get him outta there or so help me I'm gonna tear your arms off an beat ya over your thick skull with 'em!"

"Calm down, TC." Magnum said, feeling like he was trapped in some B-grade horror movie. "I talked to Dr. Collins and he said it's not unusual for someone like Rick to start behaving like this during the first stage of treatment. He said it will pass."

"What did Dr. Harrison say?" TC asked, calming a little. "Did he agree?"

"I didn't get to talk to Dr. Harrison yet …"

"Isn't Harrison the one treatin' Orville?"

"Yes, and Dr. Collins said he thinks Dr. Harrison is doing a fine job."

"Fine job? I'll tell ya fine job! Fine job is what ya got Orville inta over there!"

Magnum held the phone away from his ear again. "Would you calm down, I think I'm going deaf."

"You're gonna be dead if Orville don't get better!"

"I'm going to talk to Dr. Harrison in the morning. Rick will be fine, just give me a couple of days. I promise."

"Two days, an if he aint any better, I'm taking it out on you!"

Julie kept a close watch on Rick as he paced on the deck. Every little sound seemed to startle him and he glared distrustfully at anyone who came near. He didn't stray too far from Mia, she seemed to be the only reason he stayed outside.

When Julie came to take Mia back inside for lunch, Rick followed silently.

"Are you going to eat lunch with us?" she asked.

Rick moved the chair so that his back was to the wall, eyes darting rapidly around the room. "Yes."

Julie smiled, "That's good. When you're upset it affects Mia and you don't want to do anything to hurt her, do you?

"No." Rick grudgingly accepted the tray from Marcus.

Lunch was quiet. Rick ate everything, even accepting a bowl of ice cream.

He accompanied them out into the garden, taking a seat close to Mia. When Julie left, he was telling Mia about fishing off Koana Point.

At ten minutes to three, Marcus went out to get Rick for his appointment. Rick didn't like being taken back inside, he punched Marcus, splitting the aide's lip.

Marcus laughed, grabbed Rick in a bear hug and carried him, kicking and cursing into the doctor's office.

Dr. Harrison didn't seem at all surprised by Rick's attitude. He sat at his desk, leaning back in the chair, watching as Rick was dropped into the chair.

Rick calmed somewhat, sparing a furious glare at Marcus before turning his attention to the psychiatrist.

"Still having trouble controlling that temper are we?"

"I don't like being bullied."

"Marcus? A bully?" Dr. Harrison laughed. "He's as gentle as a kitten," Harrison was no longer amused, "as long as you behave." He opened the file and read it for several minutes before speaking again. "Why do your friends call you Rick?"

"It's what I prefer."

"You don't like the name your parents gave you?"

"It's a family name; I prefer to be called Rick."

"How did you come to choose that over say, 'Bill'?"

"You have my military files," Rick snapped. "So why are you asking me when it's right there in front of you?"

Dr. Harrison smiled, "You refused treatment at a military facility when you returned to the States, why?"

"I didn't need 'treatment'," Rick was trying hard not to lose his temper, "I'm not crazy."

"I don't think you're crazy, _Mr. Wright_."

Something in the way Harrison said his name made Rick shudder.

"Do you dream about the war?"

"Sometimes."

"You dream about the men in your unit."

"Mostly about the teams we picked up."

"Are these bad dreams?"

"I see all the men that I couldn't save over there. They blame me for their deaths." Rick said.

"You feel guilty about surviving while they didn't?"

"I guess you could say that."

"Do you think that they deserved to live more than you do?" he asked.

"Sometimes I wonder why I lived and so many good men died."

"You don't think you are a good man?"

"I was afraid over there."

"War is a scary thing, I'm sure everyone was afraid."

Rick ducked his head. "Not Thomas."

"Thomas?"

"My friend Thomas Magnum. He and Theodore were the bravest guys I know." Rick looked up. "They weren't afraid of anything."

"You were a door gunner, that took a lot of courage."

"I was just a gunner, Theodore was a pilot and Thomas was a SEAL ... they were never scared."

"What did you do when you were afraid?"

"I pretended I wasn't."

"You were awarded a Distinguished Service Medal."

"I was hit when we were picking up a unit at a hot LZ."

"LZ?"

"Landing Zone. There were a lot of VC … Viet Cong firing on us. A round came through the panel and caught me in the side but I kept laying down cover fire. I had to keep Charlie's head down so the unit could get on."

"Were you afraid then?"

"I was terrified that I was gonna screw up and that they would die because of me."

"But they didn't."

"Most of them made it. I saw Doug Streeter take a hit in the guts. We had to dust off before anyone could get to him. I saw his face when we left him there. He hated me, I know he did."

"It wasn't your fault you had to leave him."

"I should have saved him; he died because of me."

"You would have died, what good would have that been?"

Rick's expression turned cold and he tilted his head, looking at the doctor through narrowed eyes. "I should have saved him." His voiced was harsh and low.

"If you had done a better job of laying down cover fire, someone could have gotten to him?"

"Yes!"

"So you were remiss in your duty. Perhaps you should have been removed as door gunner and sent back to the States."

Rick didn't say anything, just glared at the psychiatrist.

"Did you deliberately do a poor job of protecting the men in hopes that you would be dismissed? Did you purposely let these men die in hopes of saving yourself?"

Rick was out of his chair in an instant but Marcus was quicker, grabbing the former marine in a choke hold with Rick's hands just inches from the doctor's neck.

"Perhaps we should continue this at your next session, Mr. Wright." Harrison had a satisfied smile. "Marcus will take you back to your room."

The aide seemed to take delight in keeping a tight grip on Rick as he guided him out of the doctor's office.

When the pair was gone Harrison got up and crossed to a cabinet where he removed a video tape from the recorder, he labeled the tape and stored it in the cabinet along with several others.


	6. Chapter 6 Grand Illusions

_For Becky - thanks for encouraging me and for braving all those stupid pop-ups to read and review!_

Long Ago and Far Way

Chapter 6 – Grand Illusions

Back in his room, Rick began to pace. "What the hell have I gotten myself into?" he asked himself softly. "I can't keep this up; it's getting too hard. I gotta tell Thomas it's off and get outta here." Rick stopped pacing and stood for a moment looking out the window. Out in the courtyard he could see Mia sitting in her wheelchair. Watching her, he frowned. "I gotta help Mia. She needs me." Rick sat down on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands. "What am I gonna do? I don't want to stay but I can't leave Mia." He stood up and went over to the dresser. Taking a comb out of the top drawer, he combed his hair then straightened his shirt and tie. Rick walked outside to the courtyard and went over to where Mia sat. For a couple of hours, he talked to her about the flowers, the wind and the water; safe subjects, things that mattered little but it made him feel calmer. He was certain that she could hear him, that once he'd seen the ghost of a smile on her lips.

"It's time for dinner." said Susan, coming to take Mia back inside.

Rick looked up, noticing for the first time how late it had gotten, "Oh." The sun was setting. "Is it okay if I take her in?"

Susan looked at him, noticing how his hands were trembling and the haggard look in his eyes. "I suppose it would be alright."

The nurse didn't object when Rick took a seat at the table with Mia.

"You need to eat, Mr. Wright." She scolded him as Marcus set a tray on the table, "You don't want to have to be fed like this do you?" Susan held up the paste that she was preparing for Mia.

"I'll eat." Rick replied, and he did. After dinner, he felt groggy and Susan had Marcus help Rick back to his room. Rick fell asleep almost as soon as he laid down.

"_Waterbug Blue this is Homeward Angel, Waterbug Blue this is Homeward Angel, come in Waterbug Blue."_

"_About time TC. Did your alarm not go off?"_

"_I think I killed it last time."_

"_Rick, don't you ever get tired of hauling his butt out every morning?"_

"_Thomas you know it's become like a hobby to me now." Rick stepped out of the chopper, onto the skid and fired at the enemy soldiers below. He twisted in his harness, aiming under the belly of the bird at the VC directly below. "I see your smoke, Waterbug Blue. Two o'clock Theodore." Rick flinched as a round of lead spattered against the roof of the chopper, just missing his head. "Hang on a mic, I've got some nosy neighbors at our six." The gunner mowed down the small group of enemy soldiers that had been firing at the chopper. "Got 'em, let's get back to the picnic."_

Rick was awakened the next morning by the loud growling of his stomach, he felt more tired this morning than he had the previous days. He was quiet when he joined Mia and Julie at the breakfast table.

"Feeling better this morning?" Julie asked.

"Tired." He replied, he was hungry but even eating seemed like an exhausting task. "Can I have some coffee?"

"Caffeine doesn't go well with the medications you're taking," Julie said. "How about a glass of juice?"

He was too tired to argue with her. "Okay."

Marcus set a bowl of oatmeal and a glass of apple juice in front of him. "Going to behave yourself today, little man?" he asked.

"Thank you Marcus," Julie said, glaring at the aide. "That will be all."

He moved away but not before giving Rick a predatory grin.

Rick ate slowly, the spoon seemed to weigh heavier than a spoonful of oatmeal should.

"You'll feel better after you take your vitamins." Julie promised, handing him the cup of pills.

Rick obediently tipped the cup into his mouth and swallowed, washing the medications down with half the glass of juice. He missed the edge of the table and when he released the glass it shattered on the floor.

Rick grabbed his napkin, "Sorry."

"Don't worry about it, you just relax," Julie said. "I'll clean it up." She carefully picked up the glass shards and put them on the tray. When the mess had been cleared away she asked Rick if he wanted to go back to his room and lie down.

"No." he answered slowly, "I'd rather be outside with Mia."

Julie smiled, "Are you sure you feel up to it?"

"I just need some fresh air, that will wake me up."

He followed Julie and Mia out to the deck, taking a seat facing the door.

Less than half an hour later Thomas appeared, he carefully approached, holding out a copy of the Chicago paper like a peace offering. "Hey Rick."

"Please tell me that's coffee in that cup."

"Um, yeah," Thomas eyed him warily. "Do you want some?"

"I'd kill for a cup of coffee right now."

Magnum hastily set the cup in front of Rick, "You can have it."

Rick picked up the cup, swallowing the entire contents before speaking again. "Thanks, Thomas you're a lifesaver."

"Hopefully of my own." he muttered. "Are you feeling okay?"

"Haven't you anything better to do than to keep popping in here early every morning and asking a lot of fool questions?"

The look on Magnum's face made Rick laugh, "Sam Spade, _'Maltese Falcon'_."

"I knew that, really, I did." Thomas laughed nervously, "Seriously Rick, TC and I are worried about you."

"Why?"

"Well yesterday you were…" Magnum hesitated, "Really, really… _grouchy_."

"I was?" Rick looked carefully at Magnum, trying to decide if he was kidding.

"You told TC you were going to chop his hands off and make ashtrays out of them."

"No I didn't."

"And you told me you didn't know how to play chess."

"That's ridiculous, I win the chess tournament every year."

"That's what I told you." Thomas shifted restlessly in the chair, "I thought you were going to try to strangle me, you were out of control yesterday."

Rick wondered if what Thomas was telling him had anything to do with Marcus' earlier cryptic comment. "I was violent yesterday?"

"Well, not violent really, just really … verbally abusive." Thomas was concerned and it was obvious in the way he leaned toward Rick, "Don't you remember?"

"Yesterday is really hazy," Rick admitted, "I remember feeling really good when I woke up but everything after breakfast is a blur."

"Are you still wanting to stay here?" Magnum asked.

"Have you found whoever has been threatening Mrs. Metcalf?"

"No."

"Then I'm staying. Mia could be in danger." Rick looked around, checking to see if anyone was watching, then he pulled a napkin out of his pocket and handed it to Thomas. "Give these to Eudyce at the hospital. The nurse says they're vitamins but I'm not so sure."

Thomas took the napkin and tucked it into his pocket without looking at the contents. "Are you sure you don't need to be taking this stuff?"

"I'm fine, Thomas." Rick's voice took on an angry edge, "Just do it, okay?"

"I will, just don't get all cr…cranky again."

"Are you calling me crazy?" Rick's voice grew louder, "You think I'm nuts?"

Thomas looked around, hoping that the nurse would show up again, "Uh, no. No, I think you're just fine."

Rick winked at him, "Why don't you just get out here then? I'm not a freak for you to stare at!"

Thomas got up, backing carefully away from Rick, who seemed ready to attack him again.

"Okay, okay, I'm going." He spotted the nurse rapidly approaching, and Marcus, right behind her. "I'll come back tomorrow, okay?" He winked at Rick, relieved that he had been right, Rick was just putting on a very convincing act.


	7. Chapter 7 Ties That Bind

_Thanks Becky - You're the best!_

Long Ago and Far Away

Chapter 7 – Ties That Bind

"If you're going to get upset every time one of your friends visit, we may have to stop letting them come to see you." Julie warned.

"I'm fine," Rick insisted. "I'll be okay if they come."

"One more outburst, and I'll bar them."

"I'll be quiet, I promise."

The afternoon passed quietly, Rick spent the day telling Mia amusing stories about working in the circus.

"You're in a much better mood today." TC said, settling down on one of the garden benches. "You're not going to threaten to cut my fingers off and feed them to me?" He teased.

"Nah, I'm saving that for tomorrow."

"You really had me going yesterday. I called Thomas up and threatened him if he didn't get you out of here."

"I'm not leaving until we get this case solved TC."

"Chill Rick, I understand. It's okay. I just worry about you."

"I'm a big boy TC, I can take care of myself."

"I know, I know but this place just freaks me out, it's weird all these crazy people just running around loose in here like this."

"Excuse me?"

"Well, you know," TC stammered, "It's not like a …"

"It's not an insane asylum TC, it's a medical support facility." Rick explained. "The patients here aren't crazy, just in need of professional care."

"Yeah, um, like your friend Mia."

Rick glanced at the girl and smiled, "Yeah, like Mia."

"I'm sorry to interrupt," said Julie, "but it's time for your therapy Mr. Wright."

"Well I guess I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Yeah, thanks TC."

Rick was amused by Marcus disappointed reaction when Rick left for his therapy without complaining, he whistled as the aide trailed him to the office.

"You're in a good mood." Harrison said.

"It's a beautiful day in paradise, what's there to be unhappy about?"

Harrison raised his eyebrows, while Marcus glowered and shrugged his shoulders.

"In Vietnam, you were a sniper class gunner on a helicopter." Dr. Harrison read from Rick's file. "Did it bother you to kill people?"

"What kind of question is that?" Rick asked angrily.

"I just wondered how you reacted to taking the lives of other people." Harrison said calmly.

"It was war, kill or be killed."

"How many people did you kill during the war?"

"I didn't keep track." Rick's hands tightened on the arms of the chair.

"Ten? Twenty? A hundred? You must have a general idea."

"I don't know! Why do you keep hounding me about this? What's the point?"

"You killed innocent people as well as enemy soldiers."

"No!"

"Your military files say you did."

"I didn't know!"

"So you would have left them alone, let them live if you had know they weren't soldiers?"

"Of course!"

"You don't kill innocent people?"

"I'm not a murderer." Rick growled.

"You threatened two united states marshals."

"I didn't know they were police officers."

"You seem to have a tendency to shoot first and ask questions later," Harrison needled Rick. "If they're alive later."

"I'm not a danger to other people," Rick said calmly, "if that's what you're trying to imply."

Harrison sighed. "You're learning to control your temper, that's good." He didn't look pleased. "I think that's enough for today."

Marcus followed Rick out. "I don't need an escort to my room today, thanks." he told the aide.

Susan was delighted to see that Rick was in much better humor at dinner, he made her laugh and took his evening medications without complaint. She didn't notice that he'd palmed the tablets instead of swallowing them.

Three a.m. and Rick awoke without benefit of the alarm clock. He slipped out of his room and down to the nurse's station. He checked carefully to make certain that Susan was in the lounge as was her routine. The night duty nurse was sitting at the table, munching on carrot sticks and engrossed in the paperback she was reading. Rick crossed to the med room behind the desk, picked the lock and closed the door silently behind him. Each patient had a container that their medications were kept in. He pulled out the one with Mia's name on it and scrutinized the label. Retrieving an identical bottle from the stock under the counter he switched out the one in the container for a fresh one, making certain that he matched the levels of liquid in the phial. He tucked the bottle he had taken under his shirt and quietly made his way back to his room.

The next morning when Magnum brought him the newspapers, Rick slipped the vial to Thomas. "Take this, get it analyzed and let me know what's in it."

"What is it?"

"It's the medication they give to Mia, I think it's what is keeping her catatonic."

"Don't you think that's a little unlikely?" Magnum laughed, "It sounds like a plot from a bad TV show."

Rick didn't laugh. "If you didn't want my help why did you ask me to come here?"

"Sorry Rick, it just sounds a little paranoid."

"I'm not paranoid," he angrily replied, "I just think we should check every possibility. Did you have Eudyce check those pills I gave you?"

"Not yet." Magnum hesitated, "I'm going over there today."

"Thomas! The nurses have been watching me like a hawk, making sure I take all my meds."

"I'm sure they wouldn't give you anything that was bad for you, I mean this is a medical facility, the doctors know what they're doing."

"Yeah, you're probably right. But get that stuff checked anyway okay?" Rick began to absently rub his hands nervously. "Call me right away even if it's nothing."

"I will."

"Get out of here then, I'm tired of looking at you!" Rick shouted.

Magnum winked, trying hard not to smile, "Hey, it's okay, I'll call you later tonight, okay?"

"Whatever." Rick grumbled.

"Mr. Wright," Julie said angrily. "You will be sedated and placed in restraints if you do not calm down right now."

Rick had grown more and more irritable since breakfast. His eyes were wide, pupils dilated to the point of making them seem completely black. He glared with ferocious intensity at everyone who moved in his direction.

"I am calm!" Rick snapped.

"Do I need to call Marcus?" she threatened, unaffected by his temper.

"If he touches me again I'll gut him!"

"Your room, _now_." Julie's voice was harsh, "You will go of your own free will or you will be taken there. It's up to you."

"Fine!" Rick shouted, "I'll go, but you keep that ape away from me if you don't want to be cleaning up his blood!"

Julie followed him back to his room and once he was inside, she locked the door. "I'm calling Dr. Harrison."

"Call him, I don't care!" Rick punched the door. "I'll kill him too!"

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	8. Chapter 8 When It Rains

_Thanks Becky - You ROCK!_

Long Ago and Far Away

Chapter 8 – When It Rains

Magnum drove back to Honolulu, part of him was troubled by Rick's behavior, he couldn't put his finger on it but something just seemed wrong. His mood wasn't lightened any by the storm rolling in from the mountains. As he parked in the visitor's lot at Queen's Hospital the rain began to pour down, stinging his bare arms. Hopefully the storm would pass quickly, he hated driving the Ferrari with the top on, it make the car feel like a coffin.

Edmund Eudyce was a friend of Rick's from Chicago, the lab tech had gotten tired of winter and two years ago moved to Oahu. Rick had helped him to settle in and Eudyce didn't mind doing the occasional favor in return for the help he'd received.

Magnum stopped at the window and rang the bell. "Hey Eudyce, it's Magnum. Rick sent me."

The tech was busy, peering into a microscope and scribbling something on a pad of paper. "What do you want?"

"I need you to check these and tell me what's in them."

"Leave it in that tub and I'll call you." Eudyce answered, not looking up from the microscope.

"I need it right now." Magnum protested, "It's really important."

Something in Magnum's tone of voice made Eudyce look up, "Okay." He walked over to the window and accepted the vial and capsules Magnum held out.

Edmund took a sample from the vial and poured it on a strip of paper that he then put into a machine. He stared at a graph that appeared on the monitor. "That's mislabeled, it's droperidol." He explained what the medication was used for and the possible side effects. Eudyce took the capsules and went over to another station where he opened them, emptying the power onto a tray.

"That's odd."

"What?" Magnum asked.

"There's two compounds in the capsules, definitely not a manufacturing mixture, it's too poorly combined." He put a sample on a slide and looked at it under the microscope. "Hmmm."

"What is it?"

"I'm not positive." He pulled the slide out and added a drop of blue liquid then sniffed the mixture. "Halcion."

"What's it for?"

"It's given to people who are having trouble sleeping."

"Then it's nothing to worry about, right?"

"That depends on who these were given to. This dose would be fine for someone like Moki but it could be really bad for you."

"Moki weighs like 325, he …" Thomas looked worried, "What do you mean by bad?"

"For a guy your size it would have the opposite effect, you'd end up being restless and cranky."

"Cranky." Magnum repeated thoughtfully.

"You know, irritable."

"Violent?"

"It's possible, depending on what other medications you were taking."

"What kind of medications would make it worse?"

"MOAI inhibitors, SSRI - mostly anti-psychotic medications."

Magnum was gone before Eudyce could ask where the pills had come from.

Magnum had a little trouble getting through to Rick, the weather was playing havoc with the phone service, the line crackled and clicked.

"Eudyce checked those meds you gave me, what's in the bottle isn't what's on the label."

"What is it?" Rick asked.

"It's droperidol, a powerful sedative, in the right quantity it could mimic catatonia."

"Thanks Thomas, I gotta go."

"Rick wait!" Nothing but a dial tone answered him and no one picked up when he tried to call back. He dialed Island Hoppers, with the approaching storm TC should be in his office. "TC, I need you to fly me to Laie."

"In this weather?" TC laughed.

"Yes, in this weather, it'll take me two hours to get there if I drive."

"You better get going then."

"It's important TC."

"It's always important when you need me to fly you somewhere." TC grumbled.

"It's about Rick."

"What about Rick? Is he in trouble?"

"I don't know for sure, I have to get there quick."

"Where are you now?"

"I'm at Queen's."

"Be ready to jump, I'll be right there."

"I don't know what's gotten into him," Julie explained, "he was fine this morning then after his friend left he became very belligerent."

"Obviously his friends are only exacerbating the problem." Harrison said. "You did the right thing in securing him in his room. Now might be a good time to talk to him, see if he will be able to tell me why he's so upset."

"He threatened to kill Marcus and you."

"Marcus can handle Mr. Wright," the doctor reassured her, "There won't be any problems."

Thunder boomed, rattling the windows. "This storm is getting worse, perhaps you should get all the patients back to their rooms." Harrison told the nurse. "Ask Marcus to bring Mr. Wright to my office."

"Yes, Doctor."

Marcus found Rick in the hallway, "How'd you get out here, little man?"

Rick backed up to his door, eyes searching for an escape. "If you touch me, I'll kill you." he growled.

"Ooh, I'm scared." Marcus replied, making a grab for the smaller man.

Rick dodged him, managing to get a few yards down the hallway before the aide tackled him. Marcus picked him up, holding Rick tight with an arm across his neck and forced him to walk to Harrison's office.

"Mr. Wright," Harrison laughed, "I'm so glad you could join us."

"I'm not… in the mood… to chat." Marcus's hold on him made speaking a little difficult, not to mention breathing.

"That's okay," the doctor was filling a syringe, "You're not here for that. You're going to kill your new friend, Mia. Don't worry, you won't remember a thing." Dr. Harrison said. "Hold him."

Marcus tightened his grip on Rick, pinning his arms behind his back. Harrison stabbed the needle into Rick's shoulder.

Harrison stood over him, laughing. "Brooke was so worried that your friend was going to uncover the truth when he sent you in here but it just made things all the more easy. Brooke needed Mia out of the way in order to inherit her late husband's fortune but we just didn't know how to make it look like an accident. Then you showed up. A Vietnam vet that goes crazy and murders one of the patients, it's almost too perfect."

"I'm not crazy!"

"Your friends think you are. You see, the combination of medications you've been taking have been affecting your short-term memory and making you short tempered, not something you'd have noticed but your friends certainly have. Mr. Magnum even tried to have you removed from here but Dr. Collins and I agreed that it would be better for you to remain in my care." Harrison was obviously pleased as he continued, "I read all your medical records, even your military discharge psych evaluations. I couldn't have ordered a more perfect patsy. I asked Marcus to pick up a few things from your house," he unsheathed the K-Bar, admiring the ebony blade, "This knife that you kept in that box with the pictures will be the weapon you use to kill Mia."

Rick's head snapped up, "No! You can't…"

"Mr. Cooper, if you will be so kind as to go bring Miss Metcalf to join the party."

Marcus grinned evilly at Rick as he shoved him into a chair. "Don't worry, I won't be gone long."

Rick jumped up and a wave of dizziness crashed over him, he dropped to the floor.

"I see the yohimbine is kicking in." Harrison laughed, "On its own, it's rather harmless but when combined with the halcion and the ativan, it has a bad side effect after about thirty minutes. It causes severe hallucinogenic flashbacks."

Rick pulled himself up on the corner of the desk, knocking the lamp off in the floor.

"Give it up." Harrison punctuated his words by striking Rick in the chest with the butt of the knife. "You're going down."

And Rick did go down again, taking a tray of medications to the floor with him this time.

He scrabbled around in the chaotic spill for a few moments, then staggered to his feet.

"You just don't know when to stay down do you?" Harrison hit him with the knife butt again.

"If you had understood any of what you read in my files," Rick grabbed Harrison and pulled him so that they were face to face, "you would never have let me get this close." He twisted Harrison's wrist and the doctor moaned.

Rick didn't even flinch as Harrison coughed and blood sprayed his face. He pulled the blade free and let Harrison's body drop to the floor.

The door opened and Marcus pushed a struggling Mia inside, "I don't think she…" he broke off when he saw Rick, shoved Mia away and fired. The gun jammed, refusing to fire again.

"Mia!" Rick threw the knife, praying it would serve as enough of a distraction that he could get to the fallen girl.

Miraculously the edge of the blade sliced across Marcus's arm and he dropped the pistol and ducked back out into the hallway.

Rick stumbled to the door, slamming it closed and locking it. "Are you okay?" He pulled Mia to her feet.

"I'm alright." she stared wide-eyed at his blood-covered face. "You're hurt."

"Not mine." He nodded toward Harrison's body.

There was a loud thump as something hit the door.

"We gotta get outta here. Can you run?"

"I think so."

Rick snatched up the pistol and opened the French doors that led onto the patio, it was pouring down rain outside.

Mia had a hard time keeping up with Rick, he was almost carrying her and it was slowing them down. Rick stopped beside one of the small sheds that contained the gardeners' tools. Using the butt of the pistol he broke the hasp on the door.

"Stay in here no matter what happens." He cautioned her, "I'll lead him off and come back for you."

"I'm scared."

Rick helped her inside, there was barely room for her. "You'll be alright, I promise." He closed the door and used a twig to prop the hasp up. "Stay quiet Wendy, I'll be back."


	9. Chapter 9 Paint It Black

Becky - Sorry it took me so long to post this next chapter. Thanks so much for your encouragement!

Long Ago and Far Away

Chapter 9 – Paint It Black

The wind was picking up, driving the rain in curtains. Thunder rumbled and lightning flashed over the mountains as TC landed the chopper on the front lawn of the clinic.

"What's the plan, Thomas?"

"Rick's out of his mind, so try not to hurt him." He checked his pistol, clicking the safety. "Try not to let him hurt you either."

"What about Marcus?"

"If you find him make sure he can't get in our way. If you find Rick, bring him back to the lobby."

"I don't like this."

"Neither do I. Let's go help Rick."

They split up and Thomas cut through the lobby toward the offices while TC went back to the patient rooms.

Magnum found a blood trail in the hallway and tracked it back to an office. The door had been forced open, hanging by one hinge. Just inside, he noticed the blood covered knife on the floor and several feet away, Dr. Harrison. Thomas checked for a pulse, even though he knew from seeing the knife wound that the man would be dead. "Rick, what have you done?" he whispered to himself as he followed the blood trail that led outside where he lost it in the rain.

The storm was dragging, stalling out over the mountains as the thunder rumbled loudly and lighting continued to pound the forest. Magnum could hardly hear and visibility was so bad he couldn't see three feet ahead of him.

"Rick!" he shouted, hoping his friend could hear him. "Rick, where are you?" Hearing a gun fire, he started running, heedless of the branches slapping at him. He crashed through an overgrowth and fell when something hit him in the shoulder.

Magnum was barley aware of being pulled through the mud and under the cover of a tree. "Rick?"

"Thomas! What the hell are you doing out here?" Rick demanded.

"Looking for you." He groaned and Rick pushed him back down.

"You're supposed to be in Honolulu, I could have killed you just now!"

"Lucky for me" Thomas moaned, "you sush … a lousy… shof."

Rick growled angrily, pulled off his shirt and held it against the wound. "Stay awake Thomas! Come one, you gotta hold pressure on this."

"'m fine." Magnum slurred.

"You're not fine, you're going into shock, now hold this!"

"Wha you goin'?" Thomas asked as Rick stood up.

"Be quiet! Someone's coming."

"Whoa!" TC stopped short, staring at the gun pointing at him. "Take it easy Orville, you remember me? I'm your friend."

"Dammit TC get your ass over here!" Rick lowered the gun.

"I'm not gonna hurt you."

"Jesus Christ, I don't have time for this shit, Theodore! I am not crazy but I am getting pissed that everyone is treating me like I am. Get over here and help me with Magnum!"

"What happened to Thomas?"

"I shot him."

"What!"

"I didn't know it was him." He glared at TC, "He's gonna be okay but you'll have to carry him."

"Carry him?"

"I can't carry him; I'm average height, he's twice my size. You, on the other hand, are a freak of nature like Thomas so you get to carry him while I take point. Now move it!"

"Rick, what the hell is going on?"

"They're trying to kill me…Don't you look at me like that," he glared at TC. "I am not lost in some paranoid delusion! I don't have time to explain it all right now just back me up on this okay?"

"Where's Mia?"

"Who?"

"The girl in the wheelchair."

"She's safe." He replied distractedly. "Let's move, we're sitting ducks out here."

"What about Dr. Harrison?"

"Dammit, I don't have time for twenty questions, get Thomas up and let's go now if you want to live!" He rubbed his bare arms, "I'm getting cold and shivering is going to make me burn up the dose of ephedrine which means that shot of yohimbine is going to kick in and then you will be in the shit."

"What are you talking about man, you're not making any sense."

"Harrison injected me with yohimbine; mix it with the meds he has me on and you get some nasty flashbacks. I managed to grab an epipen but that's not gonna last long. You're going to end up in my nightmares if you don't get the hell out of here."

"Shit Rick I was in 'Nam with you, I lived the nightmares."

"Not mine."

"Hey Wright!" Marcus shouted, "I know where you are!" Bullets peppered the ground only a few yards from them. "I'm going to find her you know, and when I do I'll be sure to kill her slowly just for you."

"You and Thomas keep your heads down; he doesn't know you're here. I'll take care of him."

"Rick, he's got a gun and he wants to kill you."

"You think I don't know that!" Rick snapped. He broke the pistol down, flicked the cartridge out and reassembled it.

"You stay with Thomas, I'll go." TC offered.

"No! I can handle this. I'm not the scared puppy tagalong little brother you two think I am."

"Come on out," Marcus taunted. "Let's see what you've got, weapons specialist Sergeant Wright."

"Don't do this, Orville." TC grabbed Rick by the wrist.

"Don't tell me what to do!" Rick yelled as he shook free. "Leave me alone TC, I can feel it… you better get Thomas and get out of here while you still can."

"I'm not leaving you behind!" TC insisted.

"You stay with me and Thomas could die; you could both die. Get out of here." Rick pleaded, "Help Thomas and Wendy." For a moment he looked scared, "I'll catch up, I promise, just go!"

"Dammit Orville, wait!" Before TC could reach for him again Rick had darted out into the clearing, screaming like a banshee.

Marcus brought his gun around, firing wildly. Some angel must have been watching over Rick, not a single bullet touched him. Rick fired once and Marcus went down, legs folding under like a marionette with the strings cut.

TC pulled Magnum up, half carrying him, to stand in the clearing with Rick. He looked down at the aide; Marcus had a surprised look frozen on his face and a small, dark hole in the center of his forehead.

"Oh man…" TC sounded sick. "Jesus…" He turned to find Rick pacing back and forth, banging the pistol against his head and muttering. "Orville?"

Sirens sounded, getting louder as they got closer. TC let Magnum slide to the ground. "Hey Orville, give me the gun, okay?" he asked softly.

"No!" Rick looked wildly around, "Can't let them get me!"

"It's alright Orville, I won't let them. Just give me the gun. It's all over."

"It is?"

"I swear, no one is going to hurt you if you give me the gun." He held out his hand, "Please Orville, give it to me now."

Rick rocked back and forth, obviously debating with himself the safety of giving up his weapon. Hesitantly, he passed the gun to TC who tossed the weapon away. Minutes later police officers swarmed around them, weapons drawn and shouting. Rick struggled as he was pushed to the ground and handcuffed.

"Don't hurt him," TC pleaded as Rick screamed, "He's sick, he doesn't know what's going on."

_I have this all planned out but I'm not sure I like where it goes. The ending is so angsty I may have to totally redo it and that could take a while. If anyone pleading look at Becky would be willing to help me out with this I'd be forever grateful. Please e-mail me at: _


	10. Chapter 10 Hearts Of Stone

_A/N: I love these characters. I love the way they interact with one another, the many facets of their personalities and the potential for making them so much more._

_I also love angst. If you read any of my other stuff you know that I'm heavily into angst and hurt/comfort. Too heavily into it sometimes and I'm afraid that is what has happened to this story. Please, I'm begging you, please tell me if this isover the top with angst, tell me if it sucks, tell me if you think the characters are so far off that it should be labled AU ... I'm afraid it sucks and that is making it so hard to continue and I hate to leave it unfinished._

Long ago and far away

Chapter 10 – Hearts of stone

The ride to the hospital in Honolulu was a blur. He brushed off the officer that followed him, making sure that he told the doctor exactly what Rick had told him about the medications he'd been given. TC paced outside the treatment room where Magnum had been taken, Rick had been whisked upstairs, no one had told him anything about what was going on and it made him nervous.

Finding himself the center of attention from half the Honolulu police force, TC told them everything he knew, which wasn't much. After Thomas had been treated, he filled in Lieutenant Tanaka on the rest.

Magnum fussed with the sling, grimacing when he shifted his wounded shoulder. "The short story is this: Brooke and Harrison conspired to kill Mia in order to get the estate. Dr. Harrison was drugging Rick to make it look like he was dangerous enough to be blamed for Mia's murder. Rick killed Harrison and Marcus in self-defense."

After what seemed like an eternity of questioning, Higgins showed up with a change of clothes for Thomas. "Really Magnum," he said arching an eyebrow, "You do get into the most dire and dirty situations."

"Have you heard anything about Rick?" Magnum asked, trying to figure out how to get into his shirt with the sling still on.

"He's upstairs." Higgins unbuckled the sling and helped Magnum pull the shirt on. "He's stable and that's all they're saying at the moment."

TC grinned as Thomas managed to get the straps on the sling tangled. "Here." He straightened the straps and fastened it securely.

After questioning three doctors and five nurses they finally found out where Rick was. Dr. Collins led them to the room where Rick was. The room was plexiglass on three side, the fourth being the brick wall of the building and windowless. There was no furniture in the small room. "It's an observation room, we use it for drunks and drug addicts." He explained.

"Do you have to put him in that thing?" Magnum asked, not liking the fact that Rick had been encased in a straight jacket.

"He's going to be combative for the next several hours, I'd rather that he didn't hurt any of the staff or himself."

"It's just not right, TM. We can't leave Orville like that." Said TC

"Is there not someplace safe you could place Mr. Wright, someplace he'd be less likely to injure himself or others?" Higgins asked.

"The hospital has a private room upstairs but it's reserved for the use of visiting dignitaries and such. Even if you could get it, it's expensive."

"We shall see." Higgins replied coldly, then left.

"Can we go in with him?" TC asked, "Talk to him?"

"He's in a highly agitated state, even restrained in the straight jacket he's attacked the nursing staff."

"Please?" TC asked.

"He knows us," Thomas added, "maybe we can help him."

Dr. Collins watched Rick for a few moments before agreeing. "But if he becomes violent towards you, I insist that you leave."

"Can't you give him something to calm him down?" Magnum shifted his arm in the sling and winced.

"The drug that was administered to him that caused this state also drops the blood pressure, anything we give him to calm him would only decrease his blood pressure further and could result in brain damage or death."

"Oh." Thomas smiled slightly as he watched TC crabwalk to where Rick sat on the floor. He couldn't hear the words but he knew that TC must be telling Rick not to be afraid. TC sat down in front of Rick, reaching out slowly, palms up, to touch his friend.

Rick flinched away fearfully and TC didn't pursue him, just sat back speaking calmly.

"Thanks Doc." Magnum entered and heard the door lock behind him. He stood for a moment at the door while TC explained to Rick that neither of them were going to hurt him.

"Hey Rick." Magnum approached slowly, hands out, "It's Thomas."

"Where is Gary?" Rick asked.

"Gary?"

"Captain Hargis, what have you done with him?" Rick demanded.

Magnum exchanged glances with TC, "Umm, I'm not sure where he is right now but I'm sure he's safe."

Rick laughed harshly, "Safe, yeah."

"Is there anything we can do for you?"

"I ain't tellin' you nothin'." Rick growled. "Do your worst."

"We're not going to hurt you, Rick."

"Why do you keep calling me that?" he shouted.

Thomas looked confused, "It's your name."

"Wright, Orville W., 529-56-90, U.S.M.C."

TC nodded, motioning Thomas to look behind him. Higgins stood outside in the hallway beckoning to them.

"Hey Orville, we'll be right back, okay." TC tried to pat Rick on the shoulder but the other man twisted away from the touch.

Higgins had a satisfied smirk on his face as they joined him in the hallway. "Dr. Collins is having the private room upstairs prepared. Rick will be moved up there shortly." He spared a glance at Rick, "Perhaps Magnum, you could go to Rick's and pack him some more … suitable garments to wear while he is here."

"You got the room? How did you do that?"

"I called Master Robin, he is not without connections here."

"But what about the cost?"

"Master Robin has insisted on covering all the bills incurred."

TC sighed in relief. "You think they'll take that monkey suit off him?"

"Provided we can keep him calm, I believe that the doctor will find it reasonable to remove the restraints." Higgins nodded.

"TM, you want me to go to Rick's with you?"

"I can accompany Magnum, TC it might be easier on Rick if you were to be with him while they transfer him upstairs."

"Yeah, Higgybaby, I suppose you're right, I'll stay with Orville."

Higgins drove to Rick's house. It was a quiet trip except for Magnum's occasional gasps of pain when he inadvertently jostled his arm. "Are you aiming for every pothole or is it just an accident?" he complained.

Higgins grumbling something Magnum couldn't understand as they pulled into the driveway.

"I suppose you have a key?" Higgins asked.

"Nope." Magnum pulled a small leather case out of his pocket, "I have this." Even one handed, Thomas could pick the lock easily.

"Wouldn't it be easier to get a key?"

"Easier, yes," Magnum opened the door and stepped in. "Just not as much fun."

Higgins followed Thomas to the bedroom, "There's probably an overnight case in the closet." Thomas pointed to one of the other doors.

Higgins found a case, set it on the dresser and began filling it with the attire he thought Rick might need. "Magnum, what are you snooping into?"

"It's pictures from 'Nam." He was looking at them and dropping them into a box. "And I'm not snooping, they're all over the bed."

Higgins joined Magnum, he picked up a picture, "AHC." Higgins squinted at the photo. "The Crimson Angels."

"Let me see." Magnum said, "This looks kinda like Rick." Magnum pointed to a dark haired man sprawled across the seat of one of the choppers.

Higgins flipped the picture over and read aloud the words on the back. 'Orvi 270, Shan Lo 1967.'

"Orvi? Orville?" Thomas took the picture from Higgins, "Rick was a Crimson Angel? Those guys were the best gunners in 'Nam; the NVC used to think that just saying their name would bring them down on them."

Magnum opened up a flat black box, inside were medals and ribbons. He bit his lip and closed the box with a snap. "I met TC during my second tour, it was before Rick was assigned to his HU. The first time I met Rick I thought he was the craziest guy I'd ever seen." Magnum sat on the bed spreading the pictures out idly, "He was so damn jumpy, I couldn't figure out how a kid like him had gotten into the corps. TC said he was the best damn gunner ever, Rick could pick the bars off a VC officer at 400 yards." Magnum laughed, "But if you took him to a bar and a fight started Rick was the first one to duck and cover."

"We should take these back to the hospital with us," Higgins gathered up the pictures and papers and placed them carefully back in the box. "It might help us to understand what Rick is going through."


	11. Chapter 11 Deadly Maneuvers

_A/N: Little bit of adult language in this chapter._

Long ago and far away

Chapter 11 – Deadly Maneuvers

When they returned, TC met them at the door. "He's pretty calm right now but the doc said it would get worse before it gets better." He saw the box Higgins was carrying, "What's that?"

"We found this on Rick's bed," Magnum replied. "it's pictures and stuff from Vietnam."

"Does it say anything about that Hargis guy Orville was askin' about?"

"We haven't really looked at everything yet," Thomas watched worriedly as Rick paced rapidly back and forth in front of the windows.

"It's okay," TC said, "The glass is bulletproof, Orville ain't goin anywhere."

"TC, do you think you can get Rick to change into his clothes while we see if we can find anything on that Hargis chap you mentioned?"

"I can try," TC took the proffered bag, "Like I said, he's pretty calm right now."

Higgins took the box to a table where he and Magnum sat and started going through the papers and photographs.

TC had little trouble getting Rick to exchange his open back hospital gown for a pair of cotton pajamas. TC was a little concerned about how well the monitors the nursing staff managed to stick on Rick would work after being covered up but no one came to check so he assumed everything was functioning okay.

"Hey TC," Magnum asked, "Did you know that Rick was attached to the Crimson Angels?"

"Orville was an Angel?" TC joined them at the table, "No man, he never mentioned it."

TC took the picture Magnum held out, "Wow, Orville looked different then." He chuckled, "Look at that hair, I never saw it buzzed that short before."

"This must have been during his first tour, right after he got in country."

"Definitely fresh," TC laughed and pointed to the picture, "Did you see what's in the gun cup?"

Magnum peered at the picture for a moment then laughed, "Only a noob would be eating that."

"What are you two going on about?" Higgins asked.

"He's eating a can of ham and chokers." TC grinned, "Nobody ate that after the first try."

"Ham and chokers?"

"It's ham and lima beans, but the beans are like rocks."

"101 is dropping into the Oscar." Rick interrupted, pressing his hands against the windows, "We'll be running Snoopy with 217."

TC turned back to him, "You okay man?"

"Gotta check the bloopers Sarge." Rick said, smiling proudly. "My 60 is el and el." He patted the front of his shirt, "Can't find my chicken plate Sarge."

TC looked stricken, "What should we do?"

"Go along with him, he's remembering things from before." Higgins replied.

"I can't find my chicken plate." Rick repeated. "I'm ready 'cept for that."

"Hey don't worry about it, you'll find it." TC assured him.

"What's a chicken plate?" Magnum whispered.

"Body armor, the door gunners wore a plate over their chests while they were flying." TC replied quietly.

"I found something," said Higgins, "The pilot of 324 was a Captain Gary Victor Hargis, Rick was his starboard door gunner in 1967."

"Anything else?" Thomas asked as he watched Rick go through the motions of loading an invisible M-60.

Higgins read from the paper, "Port gunner PFC Andrew Mitchell Malone, co-pilot Sergeant James Eldon Riley. There isn't much else in here but I recall reading about an operation in 1967 involving the 101st airborne and the Crimson Angels near Marble Mountain."

"Operation Omega." TC said. "One of the biggest boondoggle missions of the whole war. The brass at Highfill wanted to cut the supplies running the Trail so they sent in teams to draw fire from the VC gun nests in the hills near Marble Mountain. It was a blood bath, massive casualties on both sides; it didn't accomplish the objective, either." TC looked angry.

"Operation Omega." Rick repeated, coming to stand beside them, "We can end it all right here." He grinned, "Stop those bastards and get back to the world." Rick whooped and began pacing rapidly in front of the windows again pumping his fist in the air and chanting, "Omega, Omega!"

"The Crimson Angels were destroyed at Marble Mountain, the entire crew of the 217 was killed, it was presumed that all of 324 died in the crash too but the remains of the door gunner and the pilot were never recovered."

"Rick and Captain Hargis."

"A survivor from the 101st reported seeing the gunner taken down by a head shot and that the pilot had been shot in the chest."

"But Rick survived."

"They both did, for a while at least." Higgins laid a paper out on the table, "Hargis later died in an interment camp but Rick escaped several months later with two other men who had also been taken captive."

"So Rick is reliving the worst year of his life."

"Undoubtedly."

"This is gonna get ugly." TC sighed.

"Hey we spent time in a camp," Magnum said, trying to lighten the mood. "we did okay."

"We were together in that, Thomas." TC looked sadly at Rick who had quieted but continued to pace anxiously. "You don't know what Orville was like when I first got him."

"Come on," Magnum's grin was lopsided, "if it had been that bad they'd have rotated him home."

"In the Navy maybe, but not us." TC shook his head, "When a Marine went home it was as cargo not as a passenger."

"I'm ready Sarge!" Rick called, "I've got us rigged for the Snoopy sir."

"Reconnaissance?"

"Snoopy wasn't snooping, it was a bait mission." TC explained, "I was never in on one but I've heard of them. They send the birds out in pairs, one flies low over the treetops to draw fire, the other is up marking where the gunfire comes from then taking out the nests."

"Dear God," said Higgins, "Sounds like suicide."

"You either got damn good damn fast or you got killed." TC admitted. "The Crimson Angels were the best Snoopy fliers in country."

"The Oscar Eight valley was estimated to have 13 gun nests per square mile, the valley was only 8 miles long." Said Higgins. "How did they expect to win at that?"

"Brass never thought about throwing people at something, they just felt the need to do something."

"Popping smoke at our three!" Rick shouted. "It's red!"

"Target the smoke, gunner!" TC shouted back. "Port gunner, mind the rail!"

"Mitch!" Rick shouted, "What the hell are you doing over there, napping? Sarge said rail!"

"Sound off TM." TC suggested, joining Rick by the windows.

"Minding the rail, Sir!" Magnum shouted, joining them.

"I guess that leaves me to play Captain Hargis." Said Higgins.

"TC, I have no idea what I'm doing." Magnum hissed.

"Suck it up, son," Rick laughed "Follow my lead, do what the Sarge tells you and you'll be fine."

"Sharks had a bar attached to the skid between the pilot's door and the rear compartment, it was used as a guide to keep an overzealous gunner from shooting up the front of the chopper during a run." Higgins whispered.

"Gotcha." Magnum frowned, "Hey," he looked insulted, "I'm not going to shoot up my own bird."

"Just mind the rail, gunner." Rick laughed. "We've got tracers out front, Cap."

Higgins looked blank and TC mouthed directions to him.

"Fire the bloopers." Higgins ordered.

"Grenades away sir!" Rick responded. "217 is making their run, sir!"

"Give 'em cover!" TC ordered.

Rick had stopped pacing, he stood staring out the window, speaking so softly that they couldn't understand the words.

"Rick?" Thomas asked.

"Orville." TC reminded him, "He's not Rick."

"Orvi?" Thomas tried, remembering the notation on the photo.

Rick turned to look at them, his expression one of pain and sorrow, "217 is going down sir, she's on fire and I've only seen two 'chutes."

"Maintain course."

"Sarge, we can't leave 'em!" Rick pleaded, "Bounce, I swear I can get 'em." He was almost in tears, "Please, I know I can!"

"We have our orders Marine, back to your duty." TC ordered harshly.

Higgins started to speak but TC waved him off. "Mitch, do we have smoke?"

Magnum forgot that he was Mitch and Higgins had to prod him before he replied,

"Red at 10 o'clock, sir!"

"Mind the rail!"

"Minding the rail, sir!"

Rick was pounding on the window with his fists hard enough to rattle the glass. "No! No! Captain Reynolds!"

"The pilot of 217." Higgins explained quietly, reading from one of the papers.

Magnum tried to pull Rick away from the window but the smaller man fought him, screaming and cursing.

"What do I do?" Magnum asked.

Suddenly Rick stiffened, putting a hand to the side of his head. Thomas lowered him to the floor as Rick went limp in his arms.

"We're hit." Higgins said gravely. "We're going down."

Rick was quiet, laying in Thomas' arms, he stared at the ceiling.

"It's going to get rougher from here on out." TC advised. "He's in the camp now. Higgins, you'll have to be careful what you say to him. Don't try to lead him on or say too much about the mission. More than likely Captain Hargis was wounded badly enough that he wouldn't have talked much anyway."

They sat in silence for nearly half an hour, just watching Rick. He startled them when he rolled out of Magnum's arms, screaming.

"Sarge! Sarge!" Rick turned around and around as if searching, "Mitch?" Rick was limping, dragging his left leg. "Cap?" he asked, tremoulsly.

TC nodded at Higgins.

"Here, Orvi. I'm here."

"Where's the sarge and Mitch?"

"I'm sorry, they didn't make it." Higgins sounded tired. "Your leg, is it broken?"

"Yeah, I think so." Rick sat down beside Higgins, "My head hurts."

"I was afraid you were dead my boy."

"Can't kill me sir," Rick laughed. "I'm too mean to die." His expression turned serious, "What about you, Cap?"

TC put a hand to his mouth, mimicking covering a cough and Higgins took the hint, coughing harshly.

"Don't worry about me." Higgins said. "I'll be fine."


	12. Chapter 12 Ashes To Ashes

_A/N: Another little bit of adult language in this chapter and a ton of angst - you've been warned. This isn't the last chapter, I really want to write more but it's harder than I though - endings are just not my forte._

Long Ago and Far Away

Chapter 12 – Ashes to Ashes

There was no holding him when he began to scream, it was if his strength had increased ten-fold. He fought them then, not holding back when he'd strike with fists and feet. Bloodied and bruised they could only stand back and watch helplessly as he writhed in agony. There were periods of silence, when he lay still and they were afraid he'd stopped breathing but then he'd whisper, chanting his name, rank and serial number. Hour after hour, he'd scream, his voice so ragged it made their own throats sore.

TC tried to get Rick to take some water but he refused the liquid, clenching his teeth and letting it spill down his chin. Rick's eyes were wide, he stared at things only he could see.

When Rick started clawing at the tile, breaking off his nails and leaving bloody lines on the floor TC couldn't bear it and tried to make him stop but Rick was determined.

"Cap's dead, got to bury him… the bugs." Rick began to claw at his arms, leaving bleeding scratches, "Bugs on me, get them off!"

TC managed to pin Rick's arms behind his back and despite the screams and a head–butt that bloodied his nose, continued to hang on to the struggling man.

"I don't know how he can keep this up." Magnum panted. "You'd think he'd be unconscious by now."

"It's fear, the adrenaline is keeping him awake." Higgins replied.

"I don't know how much more of this I can take." TC still held on to Rick, who had for the moment gone quiet. "He's meaner than a snake and twice as quick." He released Rick to Thomas and pinched his nose to stop the bleeding.

"Please let me go," Rick begged, "I just want to go home."

"Rick?" Thomas asked, trying to hang on to his friend and still look at his face. "Rick is that you?"

"I don't know anything, please stop…" Rick began to cry and struggle, "I can't… I can't!"

"Higgins, haven't you ever been through something like this before, give us some idea of what we can do to stop this?" Magnum pleaded.

Higgins shook his head, "I wish I had…"

"Kill me!" Rick screamed. "Kill me you cowardly bastards!" He wrenched free of Magnum's hold. He turned his back to them, seeming to curl inward upon himself and stood quietly for several minutes. He straightened, turned back to face them with a confident look, "Where I'm going, you can't follow. What I've got to do, you can't be any part of." The tone and cadence of his speech was different than before.

"What the hell?" Thomas asked.

"'_Casablanca_'" said Higgins. "Rick's final speech to Ilsa."

"Hey Rick." TC approached him carefully, extending a hand. "I'm TC."

Rick shook his hand, "Good to meet ya TC." A curious look quirked his features and had TC not been there to catch him, Rick would have fallen to the floor.

The door slammed open and medical personnel rushed in.

"What's going on?" Thomas asked.

"Vitals are falling, he's crashing." Dr. Collins told them.

The three friends were pushed aside as the doctors and nurses attended to Rick.

In minutes he had been placed in bed, IVs that had been prepared were set and medication to regulate his heart and blood pressure were administered.

"Is he going to be alright?" TC asked as the activity around Rick slowed.

Dr. Collins nodded, "He's burned through the aphrodyne, he's just very weak now and he needs lots of rest, but he should be back to his usual self in 48 hours."

"Rick escaped from the camp with PFC Samuel Jones who had a broken arm and a Lieutenant Henry Hammond who had been captive for nearly three years. They concealed themselves in a barn in the village of Pan Loa. Two days later they were discovered by a NVC patrol." Higgins paused, his brows furrowed. He took a deep breath and continued to read, "Rick killed the VC and got the men safely out of the village, meeting up with an Army patrol unit seven kilometers away."

Magnum looked skeptical, "Rick killed someone in hand to hand?"

"All Marines are trained in hand to hand combat." TC said defensively.

"Yeah but Rick…" Magnum laughed.

"Killed three men with his _bare_ hands." Higgins interrupted, "One of the men was later found to have been an innocent civilian farmer."

Thomas stopped laughing. "I never thought …"

"Neither of us did." said TC, "Rick's not afraid of getting hurt in a fight, he's afraid of killing someone again."

"Precisely." Higgins replied.

"All the times I've rode him for being too chicken to fight…" Magnum looked ashamed, "He never said anything."

"Would you?" Higgins asked, not unkindly.

"No, I suppose not."

They were interrupted by a low moan.

TC was the first to reach Rick's bed, "Hey hotshot, how are you feeling?"

"My throat hurts."

TC looked at Magnum then back to Rick, "You talked a lot."

"What did I say?"

"You don't remember?" Thomas asked, passing him a cup of water.

"No." Rick took a sip, "What did I talk about?"

"I don't know," TC hedged. "You mumbled most of the time, said stuff we couldn't understand."

"Oh." Rick seemed relieved by TC's answer.

"You did quote Bogart in '_Casablanca_' a couple of times."

Rick smiled, "My favorite movie." He handed the cup back to Thomas.

"You do a terrible impersonation of Bogart." Magnum teased.

"Hey," Rick protested sleepily, "you can't do any better."

"Get some rest Orville." TC said.

"We should all get some rest." Higgins said, gathering up the pictures and papers and putting them back in the box. "We can come back tomorrow."

"Good idea, Higgy." TC agreed. "We'll see you in the morning buddy."

Rick smiled, "Sure."

"'Night Rick." Thomas patted him on the leg.

"Hey Thomas, sorry I shot you."

"Don't worry about it, Rick." Magnum smiled and shrugged, "It's just a scratch, really." When he turned away from Rick his face was white with pain. "Come on guys, we need to let Rick get some rest."

Higgins drove TC back to Laie to pick up his chopper, Magnum went home, took some of the pain medication the doctor gave him and after two hours of restless tossing, gave up on sleeping and drove to Island Hoppers.

"Hey TC, what are you doing, having a barbeque?"

"No. I'm getting rid of evidence."

"You can't do that!" Thomas moved to grab the tapes from the flames but the other man blocked him.

"It's nothing that nobody needs to ever see, not even Orville." TC said, his expression was hard, brooking no arguments. "You understand me, Thomas?"

Magnum nodded and stepped back, quietly asking, "Did you watch them?"

"Yeah." TC sighed, "If Orville hadn't killed that bastard I sure would have."

"That bad huh?"

"Yeah, that bad."

"You wanna talk about it?"

"No." He stared at the curling black plastic for several minutes, "When Orville was first assigned to my bird I didn't want him, I thought he was useless, that he was gonna get us all killed 'cause he was so screwed up." TC swallowed hard, "After we got back by the skin of our teeth from one mission I must have screamed at him for a couple of hours. When I was done rippin' him up he was shaking and cowering like beat puppy and I'm ashamed to say I felt good about it." TC paused to stir the flames back up, "The next morning when he didn't show up at the mission briefing, I though he'd done me a favor and gone AWOL but he was waiting at the bird for us. Orville had spent the entire damn night going over every single gun on the ship, cleaning and loading them, making sure everything was ready to go. That was when I met Rick; tough, mouthy, stubborn, scared of nothin' Rick." He cleared his throat, "I thought he was trying for a section eight with the way he was acting but he never tried to get sent home, he stuck with me and damn if he wasn't the best gunner I ever had. He'd hear that AK popping and he was on it like a mad dog, then there's no more pop. Nothin' fazed him, he was taking them out and not even blinking." TC looked away, watching the setting sun on the ocean, "He was cold, man. A killer without a conscious and all the time acting like damn Humphrey Bogart, it was creepy. Me and the rest of the crew, we use to laugh about, but we were always afraid that some day he was gonna snap and turn that M60 on us."

"I thought he was just acting like he was crazy," Magnum admitted, "I wasn't scared of him."

"That's because you didn't know him Thomas, you didn't know Orville, just Rick."

"You talk about him like he's two different people."

"He is, though Rick has kind of faded into Orville now I guess, he's not like he was in Vietnam." TC was serious when he turned back to face Magnum, "I'm not afraid of him anymore, but I am afraid for him. He's been through more than you'll ever know Thomas and he's stronger than both of us, he had to be to survive this long. I'm not going to let anyone or anything," he looked pointedly at the ashes of the video tapes, "hurt him more."


	13. Chapter 13 Deep Greens and Blues

A/N: Thank you to Robert for patiently explaining the difference between a former marine and an ex-marine and for sharing your stories about Vietnam and the USMC.

To askacop on Livejournal, thanks for answering all my questions about guns.

To Becky, peanut2lb, MickeyLeek, dumbblonde76 and Strange Music for reading and reviewing. Without your interest in the story, the muse would have given up abut twelve chapters ago.

Thomas stood on the patio, he wanted to walk out onto the sand but his heart felt so heavy right now that he just couldn't force his feet to move.

The sun was setting, framing the people on the beach in flaming colors and he remembered the last time he'd seen Rick standing out there.

He blamed himself for that too, though he knew it wasn't entirely fault that Rick's sister had been killed, the guilt just wouldn't fade.

Thomas shrugged, trying to settle the sling into a more comfortable position and stepped out onto the sand.

Rick was watching the horizon, arms wrapped around himself as though he were chilled.

Thomas felt that chill too, it had nothing to do with the air temperature; it was the chill of memories buried.

"Hey." Rick said, seeming to sense his presence.

"Hey." He replied. "You okay?"

"Just thinking."

"We all have our demons. They were born over there but they came back with us and there's no shame in that."

"I'm not ashamed, Thomas I'm afraid."

"We're all afraid sometimes."

"Not like that Thomas, I'm afraid for other people, what if I do lose it someday?" He looked Magnum in the eyes, "I could end up killing you or TC or hell, anyone who crosses me."

"I don't think that will ever happen. You're a good man Rick, a strong man. You could have killed a lot of people but you didn't."

Rick turned away, "My first tour I kept track of how many people I killed. I was proud to be in the triple digits." His voice grew softer, "My second tour I realized I wasn't immortal and I could die. After we went down I was sure that I'd be going back to the world in a box. By my third tour I …" he worried at his lip with his teeth, "If it hadn't been for you and TC…"

"Everybody was scared over there Rick."

"Not everyone." Rick was staring at his hands, twisting the ring he always wore on his right hand. "You weren't."

"I guess I did a better job of convincing you of that than I did of me." Magnum changed the subject, "Why do you hang on to that piece of junk M19?"

"That piece of junk M19 has saved my life more than once."

"Can't you fix it so it works?"

"I could but then it wouldn't be the same gun."

"And that's important?"

"It was Gary's; it's the only thing I have left of him."

Magnum feigned ignorance of the name, "Gary?"

"Gary Hargis, he was the pilot of the first gunship I was assigned to when I hit Vietnam. When we went down he held off the VC with that until he could get me out of the chopper. An AK-47 round hit it, jammed up the exit port and it wouldn't fire anymore."

"They let you keep it?"

"What were we gonna do, beat them over the head with it?" Rick sighed, "It gave them something to rail us about, you know, the inferior western capitalist weapons."

"Yeah, damn AK-47s held up better over there than our M-16s."

"Tanaka was here." Rick sighed, brushing the hair out of his face. "He said they wouldn't be filing charges against me."

"That's great!" Thomas' smile disappeared when he saw Rick frown. "Isn't it?"

"I murdered two people Thomas, I should be punished."

"Rick…" Thomas didn't know what to say, he held his breath for a moment then let it out slowly. "Tanaka knows you were provoked into attacking Harrison and you were protecting us when you shot Marcus, it was self defense."

"I shouldn't have done it." Rick moaned. "I shouldn't have."

Thomas reached out hesitantly, laying a hand on Rick's shoulder. "Anyone would have done what you did; after all you'd been through. Harrison drugged you and he goaded you."

Rick tensed, "How do you know about that?"

"Harrison taped all the patient sessions."

"TC said he burned those tapes."

Magnum hesitated, uncertain if he should tell Rick what else Tanaka's men had found in the psychiatrist's office.

Rick stepped away from Thomas, "I killed him, I should be punished and nothing else needs to come out of this."

"I'm sorry." Thomas' voice was thick, "There's nothing I can do, Tanaka found a journal Harrison had of your sessions. That's why they won't press charges."

The utter despair in Rick's voice cut like a knife.

"Everyone will know."

"They will know that you are a strong, brave man who has endured some terrible things and lived through it."

"They'll know I'm a crazy killer."

Thomas grabbed Rick's hand, "You're not crazy," he pulled Rick's hand up to show him the ring, "You're a unique individual and you're my friend. I love you, man, and **nothing** is **ever** going to change that."

Rick looked at their hands and his eyes were dark and wary when he looked at Thomas. "You mean that?"

He had never been so certain of anything in his life as he was of this right now. He pulled Rick into a clumsy one-armed hug. "I swear it."

_END_


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